Salsa... Soros... and more!

I've griped forever about how there isn't a good Mexican "sit down" restaurant in the Hamptons.    I've complained and complained.  Yes, I like La Fondita and Sabrosa but I can't really see having a nice quiet dinner at either location.     But this summer, it seems we finally can get the whole enchilada and enjoy it too!

First in Southampton is Union Cantina.   Located at the site of the former Southampton Public House,   the "Cantina" opened in mid-June and has been packing it's tables ever since.   So far, the reviews have been pretty good.   I haven't yet been but FOHC (Friends of Hamptons Chatter) have been telling me the foods pretty solid... not outstanding but good.    The standouts according to my sources are the enchiladas, roasted peach glazed pork and the freshly made salsa.  While the prices are certainly not Taco Bell they're not exactly Nello either.    So based on the word of mouth around town it seems Union Cantina is worth a visit.    If you've been, let me know what you think.

Secondly,  The Blue Parrot in East Hampton has long been a punch line for bad food and bad service in my book forever!  I went a few years ago when it first opened under the new management which includes Jon Bon Jovi and the girl from Jerry Maguire who has a name I can't spell.   The food was overpriced, lousy and served with a snarl from the surly staff.      If that wasn't bad enough they used to have a bouncer there which would have lead you to believe, folks were clamoring to get inside.... and they weren't.   Anyway, for whatever reason I decided to stop by for a visit last week after a hiatus of close to three years.      The first thing I encountered was a friendly staff and no bouncer!     I had to wait while my table was being prepped so I sat at the bar and had a really great margarita... at $15 bucks it was no bargain but the pour was generous and the mason jar/drinking glass was filled pretty high.   

I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I like you!!!

After about 5 minutes, the table was ready and I sat down as fresh tortilla chips and salsa were being dropped off at the table.      That was followed by the house Oaxaca salad and Lime Chipotle fajitas.  While I know fajitas aren't exactly gourmet and probably not the best way to judge the cuisine, I have to say they were really good and served with fresh made corn tortillas.     By the way, yes you can make bad fajitas I should know, I worked at a Chi Chi's in college (for those of you who don't know, it was the Mexican Olive Garden of the 80's).     My partner in crime Peter had the fish tacos which which also garnered a big thumbs up.      The final verdict is that I take back all the negative things I've said in the past about Blue Parrot.    The snarky Go Fund Me page for the chef to take cooking lessons has been taken down and my mea culpa is complete.     So ,  if you've not been to The Blue Parrot in years, take my advice and give it another shot.  

Finally, just in time for August some good news about what makes the Hamptons such a fun place to live.    According to sources, billionaire investor George Soros made a stop with a few friends at the American Hotel in Sag Harbor.   While that's not anything to set rumors flying what happened when the check was delivered is the interesting part.  Apparently Mr. S. (as I call him) paid his hefty check with 4 figures not including cents and added on a 100%+ tip for the staff.     While I haven't been able to confirm this Christmas come early gift from the tight lipped staff at the hotel... my sources are pretty reliable.     Besides, what's so wrong with being nice!?

SOMETHING BREWING IN SOUTHAMPTON... AND PLEASE DON'T TELL ME WHAT ZILLOW SAYS ABOUT YOUR HOUSE!

Something Brewing.. time to change the label!

I can barley stand it!   It has some folks hops-ing mad!   Apparently the spuds will no longer be flowing on Bowden Square.   In spite of an announcement back in October that the Southampton Publick House would be staying put at the current location, word has gotten out that folks will soon have to fasten their beer goggles in a new location.    Since 1996 the brewery and restaurant have been a staple around town but it seems the new building owners have other plans.    According to some local insiders, the location will soon be home to a "high end Mexican Restaurant."     Now if you've ever read this blog before... that's a huge deal for me yet I hate to see an old favorite move to somewhere new.     While the Publick house will go on... like Celine Dion's heart.... it will according to insiders have to be in a new location.   Sometimes a little change will do you good.

Oh is that the blood rushing to your head?

Now for a little advice.   If you want to send any real estate agent's boiling blood further to their head just say the following sentence, "BUT Zillow said my house is worth X!"   It's the bane of many a real estate agent and brokers existence.   In fact, The Los Angles Times  recently tackled the issue of "Zestimantes" (Zillow's estimate) and how many claim they're wildly inaccurate.    In fact, I have to say part of the big problem with Zillow's "formula" is that it can't really take into account factors like condition and location (waterfront, south of the highway, village).    So how inaccurate are these "Zestimates?"  Well the CEO of Zillow was recently quoted as saying they're "a good starting point" and have a "median error rate of about 8%."   Obviously this error rate varies in different markets and Zillow even says so at the bottom of the Zestimates page.     While I couldn't locate the margin in our area, I can tell you that my own personal home fluctuated by about $5,000,000 in a period of 6 months.    Now, I know you think Hamptons Chatter just rakes in the money but the initial high estimate they gave my home
was crazy.   I'd move out in hours if I could get that number tomorrow!    Yep, I would guess their error rate in the Hamptons is a heck of a lot more than a 8%.   It's a big miss in the Hamptons... like an Ishtar big miss!  A "Missestimate" if you will.     So the take away from all of this... talk to an agent or do your homework (Zillow.com is a great source for closed prices) and don't try let some silicon valley geek tell you what your home is worth.   Besides,  how could you put a price on that "Sistine Chapel" painting on your master bedroom ceiling?

A Toast for Tacos.... Plus, Hamptons Hostility 2014!

For those who know me, thanks for your well wishes.   Sorry the blog takes a back seat to life but that's the way the cookie crumbles.    So now that let's get back to the "Chatter."

Well traffic is terrible, temperatures and tempers are rising and the Hamptons is now entering into what I affectionally call "Seasonus Horribus."  But while some folks find this time of year a bit challenging others relish in the chaos.      Yes, there are folks who miss the city and are pining away... and not the kind with sap... for a little hostility and confrontation.   Yes, it's the 2014 edition of Hamptons Hostility!!!   The top 5 places where you can be as nasty as you want to be and where a middle finger is just another way of saying hello!  So here in my humble opinion, are the top five nastiest locations for this year....

1) 7-11 Manorville -  While technically not in the Hamptons, it's definitely a ritual stop for more than a few city dwellers on their way out east.   My experience involved the doubling of coffee cups and the managers instance that I pay and additional $0.50!  "But sir, the sleeve doesn't prevent the cup from getting crushed in the cars cup holder."   So, while the manager didn't care for my explanation and threw me more attitude than Lizzy Grubman in a parking lot (you would have thought I dropped a 2 gallon Big Gulp on the floor) I left both cups on his counter.   Fifty cents for an extra cup, really?!  That is extortion in my opinion and not nice.   I'm now doing my stops at the Cumberland Farms.

2) The intersection of CR39A and Rt 27! - The place where allowing a car to merge in front of you is as welcome as a root canal or IRS audit!  It's also totally racist where German sedans have no tolerance for American hybrids or trucks (and vice versa).    I could tell you the way to avoid this area but why would I want to ruin my good thing!!!

Yes, I know this is the one in Riverhead!

3) CVS Pharmacy (Southampton & East Hampton) - It's the Motor Vehicles of pharmacies!   While I have no complaints about the general staff, you know the human cashiers etc.   The pharmacy has long lines and an indifferent staff that really gets annoyed with questions.   But if that wasn't enough,  try to deal with their automated phone system!   Lord help you if you need an Epi pen in a hurry!


4) Cavinola's Cheese Shop (Sag Harbor)- Yes, apparently Ina Garten thinks this shop is the big cheese..  but I think it's more tres fromage! The selection is actually extensive and good but please don't dare question the prices.  When I made the mistake of grimacing at one particular price, I got an annoyed response of "then don't buy it."   Wow, that was nice!  So guess what... I didn't .....and that cheese stood alone!   I then took a quick trip to Schivoni's who also has a great selection for a fraction of the price!    I mean, I shop at Round Swamp Farm so I'm not afraid of prices but at least be friendly!  What do I need to bring a camera crew!?

5) Nick & Toni's (the bar) - This is not about the restaurant or the employees.  It's about the patrons who sit at the bar.   If you spend any time in the Hamptons there are going to be nights when nobody is around and you want to go out and mingle and have some dinner.  Well if you're sitting at the bar at N&T's bring a book.     The atmosphere there is so chilly you'll feel like a Kardashian walking into the  Maidstone Club.  But hey, sometimes you wanna go where (signing the "Cheers" theme) "nobody wants to know your name.

Honorable Mention:  Rushmeyer's in Montauk.   The perfect place to hang if you're going out on daddy's credit card.     It's like "Logan's Run" meets the Hamptons.

I've been whining with my Sancerre for years now about the state of Mexican cuisine here in the Hamptons.      While we still don't have a decent sit down restaurant (yes, I revisited Blue Parrot one more time, it was awful and expensive -$20 burrito with what I'm pretty sure was microwaved chicken) that serves a full south of the border menu we do have another entry into the good... actually really good food to go category.   Formerly of the Wainscott Seafood shop, chef Peter Ambrose has taken his successful Endless Summer brand and opened a new taco shop at the home of the former "Food and Co."       

"Pete's Endless Summer Taco Shop" is a welcome addition to east end cuisine.    The menu which features his famous fish tacos, along with such delicacies as braised duck, nori brined applewood barbecue chicken (which blew me away... really good) and vegan selections is fairly basic but full of gourmet varieties of the Mexican treats.    There are no fajitas or burritos on the menus but there's plenty here to choose from and at a really reasonable prices, especially for the Hamptons.     Prices start at $5 per taco or 3 for $13-$16 and make this easy to go down.   Fries, salads, fresh guacamole and home made grilled tomato salsa are also available.    If you want more information go to www.peterambrose.com or call them at 631-527-5515.    Pete's Endless Taco Shop is located at 283 Pantigo Road, East Hampton.   Also make sure to try the deserts from Jennifer Corzzo... delicious!

Random Musings Vol 1. .. Cinco De Mayo, Subway and A Senior Project Sells in East Hampton!

Sometimes,  there's a lot going on in the Hamptons.   This week is no exception.   So rather than try to write stuff and link it together for a blog... not that I ever really write anything coherently.... I'm just going to throw stuff out there and here it is... oh and Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone!

Speaking of Mexican...  Sabrosa Grill is opening in Water Mill next to the Hess Station.  Let the battle of the burritos begin.     While I don't think Sabrosa will require you to microwave your own
meal, I still have high hopes for their food.    It's apparently a chain like Chipotle and it's headquartered in Lancaster, PA.  Everyone knows the Amish are experts in Mexican cuisine.   Check out their website here. 

Size didn't matter to Hamptonites!

A $5 Footlong Fiasco - Subway in Water Mill is no more.... it recently closed it's doors at the most cursed location on the East End.   You know the one where there was once a Citarella, Blockbuster, Video, Water Mill Cupcake, Foody's, Avanti and Muse among others. Apparently nobody cares about size in the Hamptons.... LOL! NOT!

I don't normally stop and take photos but this scene on the corner of Stephen Hands Path and 114 in East Hampton just jumped out at me.    What do you think this picture is saying?

Patriotic decorating in the Hamptons!

An innovative high school design!

Lisa Perry's never ending senior high school home economics project is coming to East Hampton.   I guess if anyone has enough money they can take liberties with the word "style." This beautiful ditty to the left which just screams fashion sense is now available on E-bay!  No, YOU have to pay THEM!

They go lightly in the night!

Speaking of style... somewhere the stylish Audrey Hepburn is shedding a tear.   The Tiffany and Company on Main Street is no more!  Apparently they went lightly one night a few weeks ago. Sadly, there will be no Breakfast at Tiffany's in the Hamptons you'll instead how to go to London Jewelers ... "Breakfast at London Jewelers"... hmmmmmm.... not as catchy!
Moon river and me................



Finally, is it just me but does driving along Route 27 feel a lot like playing the old video game Frogger?!   Maybe we can make this into an actual game avoid a big hole and get 100 points...  medium 50  points... small 10!?

An Ode to Spring and some Food Fodder for the East End!

Well some good news for those who love a good steak or a great juicy burger.  Sag Harbor's venerable favorite Cromer's Meat Market is setting up shop in the Hamptons Market on Race Lane.   In case you're not aware, they also provide meats to more than a dozen restaurants on the East End.  So you know they're pretty good.   Signs in the market indicate it will be opening today (March 21st).     If you remember, there hasn't been a butcher there since before the market suffered from a fire and forced renovation about a year ago.   A nice ode to spring unless of course you're a cow!

Meanwhile, sometimes a name change is just a name change   The former Agave in Bridgehampton... which is not to be confused with the old Agave in Sag Harbor or the current Agave in Westhampton... has changed its name to Mercado.  According to their website, this is due to the constant confusion with the other said restaurants.  Now, I know and I have heard the criticism that this place is the worst thing to happen to Mexican food since The Blue Parrot but I disagree.   The food is actually pretty good.   I've gone in a few times and tried the fajitas, burritos, chips, guacamole, salads, margaritas and more.  All were pretty standard and actually better than any other Mexican restaurant (other than LaFondita) in the Hamptons.   The only thing that drove me to drink after my dinner was the fact the service was the equivalent of being water boarded.    But hey it's the most edible Mexican menu with eat in service in town.    I have a few friends who actually like La Superica in Sag Harbor, but I'll to reserve judgment for now and try again when they open for the season.


If you're a person who loves new places and things, you've more than likely visited Trip Advisor.  You know the place where every day folks let you know what they think of this hotel or that restaurant.   For example, if you want a good chuckle read the reviews on Blue Parrot.    Well I recently logged onto the site and I noticed something a little odd.  The "East End Eating Disorder Center" is apparently seeking reviews on the site. While, I'm not so sure if this is a good idea, I can assure you there will be no middle ground.  My guess is most of the reviews are either the portions are too large or in fact too small.  Now, I'm not making fun of eating disorders but you have to admit, this is weird.  Besides if people are eating too much it's just as easy to take them to Blue Parrot.

Speaking of weird, do you remember that WALK OF SHAME kit that Svedka Vodka produced a few summers ago?  Well with out going into detail, you can click here.  I'm sure the folks at this summer rental had these kits in abundance.    And you thought your summer renters were bad!

UPDATE: It looks like the Cromer's move is a few days off.   Look for the opening this weekend.

Why some people just hate the Hamptons Buzz!

Well it's been a few weeks since I sat down and blogged but I'm back after a brief hiatus. It was the end of the summer here and I just needed some time to breathe and enjoy the east end. The crazy crowds are gone and the planes,

helicopters and sea planes have gone south for the winter. Speaking of the air traffic. A group of local citizens are calling themselves the "QUIET SKIES COALITION." Their mission is to do something about the ever increasing air traffic on the east end. According the group summer traffic at East Hampton Airport is about the same as Islip! Which according to the group is all the more absurd because it's a "FAA UNCONTROLLED AIRPORT" subject to no local regulation. Considering the volume they have, they believe it's a disaster waiting to happen or at the very least get worse. There is also some concern about the property values of those who lie in the path of these planes and Sikorsky helicopters. Anyway, if you want more information about the Quiet Skies Coalition you can e mail them at info@quietskiescoalition.org or visit the website www.quietskiescoalition.org.


Meanwhile, most of this summer I have avoided the new Mexican restaurant Agave in Bridgehampton. Well I've since gone their twice and I will say the talk about it is a

little unfair. While it's not Rosa Mexicana, it is a definite improvement over the food at Blue Parrot. The chips were freshly fried, the service friendly and responsive. I've tried the enchiladas and the fajitas at Agave and I'll say both were pretty good. The chicken fajitas were my personal favorite and were perfectly done with a generous portion. So while I can't say you should run to Agave, I will say if you want a casual night out with some good Mexican food head there and just enjoy it for what it is... a decent night out in the Hamptons.

Southamptons is getting a little more social!!! And one of my greatest Hamptons discoveries ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well by now we all know the tales of Ed (Jean Luc) Kleefeld... his restaurants JL East, JL Bistro, Madame Tong's and Prime 103 and their lasting legacy of cobwebs and unused commerical space. Well 2011 is a very good year for former some of the best old "JL" properties.

First, Michael Gluckman and his management team including Rory Boothby successfully launched "The Beach House" last

week. A sort of spin off to their already successful "Boat House" off Three Mile Harbor. It was the opening of the year so far when they toasted Cinco De Mayo last Thursday! The cars were lined up and down Montauk Highway and of course our local men in blue were there to issue tickets. Yes, tis the season! It was wall to wall people there to see the new and improved space that was once PRIME 103 and JL East. The new menu gets a big thumbs up for some real crowd pleasing dishes (as opposed to the impossible menu at Southfork Kitchen) and the prices that won't make your eyes pop. I'll have more about their food and plans for events at "The Beach House" later this week... today's blog is about the real estate. But one last word, KUDOS for the best opening night of the year goes to "The Beach House."

Now for the property formerly known as Madame Tong's. With one of the best backyards of any restaurant in the Hamptons, it only makes sense that the building would once again host

a hybrid Restaurant/Club. It's alleged that is exactly what will be the case with the new establishment "The New York Social Club." According to sources the menu will be more American fair that will morph into a club scene after the dinner hours. I don't know who the new owners are but I'm told they're well known NYC club/restaurant owners. Look for more details in then next few days and an opening sometime in late May.

And lastly... according to CURBED.COM, Astoria's Pomme Café is opening a at the old JLX in Sag Harbor. To many it's better known as that doomed corner where numerous restaurants have flopped, including La Maison, JLX-Bistro, and Peter Miller's. I apologize for my earlier blog... where I said La Maison is back... but that's what the "manager" guy told me.

Now, we all see those free magazines tossed in the lobbies of restaurants, banks and real estate offices all over the Hamptons. Well last week my friend picked up an old copy of Edible East End which was sitting around the house and

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told me about a small Mexican Deli in Southampton, which features authentic homemade specialties. Well as anybody who reads this blog knows, I LOVE MEXICAN FOOD. I've been on a quest to find a good restaurant that serves it.... and while it's not a restaurant the De Jesus Deli on County Rd. 39 next to PC Richard's is a HOME RUN! If I were Blue Parrot I would buy my tamales from this little shop on the Highway and serve them. They're AWESOME and some of the best I've ever had. Burritos for rock bottom prices, home made salsas and more are also available. This is an unknown find in the Hamptons. In fact, I went to a Mother's Day party on Sunday and brought along some vegetable and Pork Tamales, they were the hit of the party. Ok, enough writing... I'm hungry now. It's time for lunch.

It's a tale of two tacos and a little shoe business!

Well the hustling and bustling continues with all of the shops and restaurants on the East End as the countdown continues to the Memorial Day Weekend. One of the more industrious projects seems to be taking place at the site of the former Almond and Woodshed Inn. According to a source, permits were made with the town to turn the location into a sports bar and Mexican restaurant. It is allegedly

being done by a group from up the island and they plan to name the place "AGAVE." There was some environmental issues that needed to be worked out and that's how I was alerted. Now, if that name sounds familiar yes, there is one in the city on lower 7th Avenue and there was also one in Sag Harbor. I don't think this particular venue will have any affiliation with the aforementioned businesses but at the very least it can't be any worse than BLUE PARROT (Bon Jovi's place). So, will the Hamptons finally get good Mexican food? Stay tuned!

Now, since I've mentioned it to a few folks the constant question seems to be.. "what's a Mexican - sports bar?" It's a place with Tacos and TV sets... or maybe just burritos. Who knows!


Finally, I got my shoes back from Dutch Girl Cleaners at the King Kullen in Bridehampton. They did a really good job! They rep

laced the soles on my driving shoes and polished and fixed two others. All in all a big thumbs up. So yes Virginia, you can get a decent shoe repair in the Hamptons!

Grab your gauchos and hit the beach East Hampton!!! News and exiles from Main St.!

Well there is one less empty space on East Hampton's Main St. So who is it??? Who? Is it Hermes? Noooooooo! Is it Louis Vuitton? Nooooooooooo! Is it.... Lilly Pulitzer? HELLLLLOOOO! I said EAST HAMPTON not SOUTH! OK, here's a hint. My mother in law ... Mimi for those of you who know her... will be be tickled pink when she comes back from Boca about this news! Ok, enough. CHICOS! Now, for those of you who don't know... it's not a Mexican restaurant (that's El Torito which would be great to have edible Mexican in East Hampton) it's a woman's clothing store! Call it a J. Crew for the mature woman. How does that sound!? I personally have never shopped at Chico's although I do have a friend "______" who likes to occasionally wear Chico's stuff but on Saturday evening's only.

According to their website... "Chico’s was founded in 1983 as a small boutique selling Mexican folk art and cotton sweaters on Sanibel Island in Florida. Our friendly environment and unique styles connected with customers in a special way that quickly evolved into over 600 Chico’s boutiques nationwide, a monthly catalog, and round-the-clock shopping at www.chicos.com." WHAT!?!?!? WARM AND FRIENDLY?!?!?!? This isn't IOWA folks! It's the Hamptons!!! Nice doesn't play in these parts!!! I assume they'll do attitude trainging for the East End clientle.

The location will be on the end of Main St., the former site of Prudential Douglas Elliman's old stomping grounds. So the big question is why didn't that other real estate company go into the spot? Apparently Fearless Leader along with Moose and Squirrel were spotted weeks ago measuring, designing and talking deals and then suddenly zippo!

Hola! Some new cuisine from South of the border!!

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Ok, let's be real here! The East Hampton Independent just published their review of the new "latin cuisine" restaurant D'Canela in Amagansett. I love the Indy as it's affectionatly called on the east end ... they're kind of the rogue paper on the East End and they never hesitate to ruffle feathers but I've yet to really see a negative review on ANY restaurant. BUT I DIGRESS! Let's get back to the issue at hand... D'CANELA.

It's located at 195 Main St., Amagansett the home of the old Main Street Cafe. The decor as you can see from my lousy Iphone picture (but I do love my Iphone, more on that later) is sleek but a little cold. Who knew liquor bottles could ad so much warmth to the decor!? The round neon "open" sign didn't help much either, I felt like I was dining somewhere in Asbury Park. Even though I felt south of the Jersey border instead of in Mexico, I can tell you the interior was clean and the service was prompt and friendly. I'm sure in time, they'll get more liquor bottles, warm up the place and have a license to serve booze but in the meantime BYOB and save some dinero!!!!

So how was the food? We started with a mixed green salads and some chips and guacamole. They all got a B+. The salads were fresh and tasty as was the guacamole and the chips were crisp, thick and NOT greasy. So far... So good... they're already about 10 steps ahead of the inedible BLUE PARROT! Now when it came time for the entrees things went downhill a bit. We weren't exactly an adventourous crowd. Two chicken and one beef fajita and a mole chicken were the entrees. The fajitas weren't bad... but they weren't really good either. First off they came with melted cheese and my friends who are more health concious were NOT happy. Luckily our waitress did her best and got two new ones sans cheese asap! The beef fajita like the chicken was basically meat and onions with sides of salsa, sour and tortillas. The peppers; green, red and jalapeno were all missing. The mole chicken was the best choice. It was moist, tasty and tender (An A-).

All in all, better than Blue Parrot but far lacking anything close to the level of say Rosa's Mexicana. But it is the Hamptons afterall and it's January. I think D'Canela will improve in time, let's just hope they can hang in there during this looooong and so far snowy winter!!!

When will the Parrot finally take flight??.. don't say anything in the Hamptons unless you want the world to hear !!

So, we've been waiting and waiting and waiting for the return of good mexican food to the Hamptons. I'm sure you're all thinking I'm going to be mentioning a 7-11 Bean Burrito again.. but I can't. I do love the nachos and the margaritas at La Superica in Sag Harbor but I'm not 25 and I actually like being able to hear my what my dinner companions say.. well certain dinner companions anyway.

I'm hoping BLUE PARROT will open soon. The longstanding tex-mex casa is being revised and revamped with the help of billionaire Ron Perelman, Jon Bon Jovi and Renee Zell...e...weigers..ener (I so can't spell). The current owners promise it will have the same atmosphere as the old hangout but with a new chef and better food. I personally don't remember what the food tasted like but the margaritas were amazing -- oh maybe that's why I never really tasted the food! I went by on Saturday morning.. no luck... called on Sunday... no answer and the message machine was full. Alright guys...we need guacamole now!! Open Already!!

Overheard:

A woman talking at the bar at Bobby Van's about her upbringing; "Wolves would have done a better job than my parents!"

Two twentysomething Prada Princesses eating ice cream in East Hampton village and remarking on the young woman with her much older husband and their triplets: "Those aren't children, they're a science experiment!"

At a dinner party Saturday night held by a major Hollywood big-wig: "I take care of myself.... I treat my body well... I treat it like a pharmacy."

Two "masters of the universe" discussing the new way of doing business: "I'm used to having free range in my business." - I guess that's not too bad... he could be a farmer with chickens?!