HAPPY HOLIDAYS ALL... MORTGAGE NEWS.... PLUS WINNERS OF OUR (lame) DECORATING CONTEST!

So there's good news and bad news here.  The bad news is you people are essentially lazy.    The good news is everyone who entered my holiday decorating contest is a winner!   Yes, I
got 4 entries.  One of which was a friend who was actually staying in my house.   So he'll get a prize along with Lisa Barone of Sag Harbor and Deanna Covino of Hampton Bays, the gang at Baron's Cove and D. Strohmeir.    So anyway, happy holidays all even though I will never do a contest like this again.   BAH HUMBUG!   Here are the winners...

Deanna Covino of Hampton Bays

Lisa Barone of Sag Harbor

D Strohmeir of East Hampton

Meanwhile, lots of news about interest rates.  They're up... and people are upset!    But wait.... defying the hike, rates actually went down?  I'm so confused!   But while folks like me are waiting for the dust to settle on what all of this actually means there's still lots of news in the lending biz.   In fact, one thing I recently learned ... wait.. why am I telling you... watch it for yourself.   Recently mortgage guru Melissa Cohn of MC Home Loan sat down with me to discuss what's happening.





FINALLY... a little something fun from the 80's music fanatic that I am.  It's 60,000 LED lights dancing to the song "We Three Kings" by Book of Love!    Gotta love this!!

MORE MORTGAGE NEWS WITH MELISSA COHN!

MORTGAGE UPDATE WITH MC HOME LOANS MELISSA COHN... PLUS, COULD YOU USE SOME EXTRA DOUGH FOR YOUR HOLIDAY COOKIES? -UPDATED!

While we all know there are a multitude of factors currently affecting the housing market, one of the most closely watched and discussed factors right now is of course interest rates.    What's going on and are they any changes coming in the foreseeable future?   Luckily I got the inside scoop from one of the most recognized and respected experts in the mortgage industry.  Melissa Cohn is the founder and President of MC Home Loans and recently I had the chance to sit down with her to discuss what we can expect to see in the near future.

It may be 60 degrees outside but the calender says NOVEMBER... so that has me asking the question to all of you. 

Ho .. ho..Ho? Available at Tipsyelves.com

Are you ready for the holidays?!    Yeah, I know it may be pushing it.... but the Radio City Christmas Spectacular is already pimping tickets so why can't Hamptons Chatter jump on the band wagon?   Well if you're not ready maybe this will make you start to get in the holiday mood!   If you're looking for a little extra cash for that holiday party, I'm here to help.   Send me a photo or short video of your holiday (Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Festivus) decorations/display OR even outfit and you'll be eligible for a $500 gift card to a buy some extra egg nogg or drinks at that special restaurant to celebrate the holidays.   I'm accepting photos of homes, offices and even cubicles.. sweaters, hats or even shoes.... but remember they have to be yours!   Once you send me the photos, I'll be checking my list and announcing 3 finalists each week between November 30th and December 18th.   The grand winner will be announced December 21st right here on the blog.    So how am I judging this thing?   Well, I'll pick the weekly finalists and it will be a combination of views on this blog and a team of my secret elves to decide the winner.   Sorry, no members of my family or office are eligible and you'll need to be over 21 years old to enter. By submitting the photo, you'll be authorizing me to publish your photo on this site and verifying it's yours and you have all rights.    I don't know why I have to say all that but it just seems like the right thing to do.     So, rather than inviting your friends to the house for Hickory Farms Beefstick, Cheetos and Mateus wine, take them out for a night on Hamptons Chatter.     This contest is also limited to residents of the Hamptons.... there will also be an out-of-towners category with a little prize yet to be determined.     So get ready to deck those halls and trim that tree... and make a buck to boot!  SEND YOUR ENTRIES TO HAMPTONSHOLIDAY15@GMAIL.COM!  Let the hunger....er... holiday games begin!

THE BRITISH ARE COMING... THE ROYAL ONES!!!! ALSO, THE POLLEN ISALREADY HERE!

The royal formerly known as Prince William, now known as Kate Middleton's husband is apparently planning to bring his Windsor brood to spend their summer in the Hamptons!   I know!  I know!   I'm as excited as the next Anglophile!    According to the rarely reliable OK magazine, the two have already rented a large estate to rub elbows with the likes of Spielberg and Martha.    According to palace "sources" they have always wanted to come here so George and Charlotte can "enjoy the sea and the sunshine."   It sounds reasonable to me, so ignore those wet blankets over at Gossip Cop that are calling this report complete b*##*#$@!     In fact, I have a few suggestions for the royals when they take that leap across the pond.   I know William will find it here on Hamptons Chatter next time he googles his name in a exhausted or drunken stupor!

Calls to Buckingham palace have not been returned!

Hi William, hopefully you didn't buy that estate yet and you'll be calling me as your agent in the near future.   Why will you call me?  Well after you enjoy these five awesome suggestions I have for you when visiting the Hamptons, you'll know I'm your go to man!

Cyril's:  Will, it's the best people watching in the Hamptons and the location overlooking scenic route 27 is fit for a King, which you should be next IMHO!   Make sure to order two BBCs (don't ask just drink) and Kate will be macking on you like you're that lead singer guy from One Direction!  

Home Goods:   Who doesn't love a bargain!?   You and Kate can stock the estate with fresh linen and towels and even those nifty plastic margarita glasses without paying a kings ransom!  Not that I hope Charles gets kidnapped and you become King... but if that happens... NO PROBLEMO!  You'll be saving a bundle and have the cash as your "HOME GOODS HAPPY."

The Essence of cool!

The Giant Duck:   OK, it's actually NOT in the Hamptons but it's a GIANT DUCK!   Hello!?  How cool is that!?

Martha Stewart's House:    She lives in town and if you give me a call, I'm happy to share her address.  Just go over, she loves drop by guests!   She'll help Kate use local flowers to make the most amazing table centerpieces and her fresh lemonade is to die for... really!   Just go!  Tell her I said it was OK.  

The American Hotel:   A Hamptons institution where you can spot an occasional celebrity and enjoy scenic Sag Harbor.  Another plus is they now have hooks under the bar for Kate's purse.    One final suggestion; I would wait till HRH Elizabeth II comes to town and bring her, she will actually be one of the younger folks at the bar, which will make her feel good.    You'll all have a blast! 

Finally, when you come to town Will... can I call you Will?... make sure to bring some good allergy medicine because it is apparently ...."POLLENGEDDON" out here right now!   Pools are green, cars are green, windows are green and my poor dog Bella is green... and it's not easy!     So, luckily I have two quick ideas you can follow to help make breathing easier here on the east end.   Try small doses of some local honey, apparently it will help you build a resistance to the pollen since the local bees use the same pollen to make the sweet stuff!   You can also try showering more frequently, apparently the pollen sticks to your skin and hair more than you realize.   So stop breathing all that dead epidermis and pollen and take a shower.  If all else fails, head to CVS and get some Claritan and make sure to register for the frequent shopper points!

YOU CANOLI IMAGINE THE CHANGE IN WAINSCOTT.... TAKE A PEEK! PLUS A TALE SO STUPID IT HAS TO BE TRUE!

Makeover Mangia!

If you've been through Wainscott lately,  you've probably noticed there's a whole lot of something going on at the former location of Georgica and Saracen restaurants.   The location is now the home of Osteria Salina and the inside has been given face lift that would make Cher green with envy!  Its been a much needed change for the 130 year old building that was more recently the home of ruckus night clubs catering to the hard partying "bottle and banquette" crowd.    Instead neighbors now have a traditional Sicilian restaurant in one of the most charming locations around.   In fact, if you ask me it looks like they spent a pretty penne to make it look good!  Sorry for the pun.

The Georgica Room with a view!   

The restaurant which was formally located on School Street in Bridgehampton has now been expanded by purveyor Tim Gaglio and his wife Cinzia (the chef) into a larger 225 seat venue overlooking Georgica Pond.   The menu will remain the same and feature old favorites like Charred Octopus, Polpette (amazing italian meatballs), Mezzi Rigitoni alla Siciliana, fresh seafood specials but with the addition of pizzas cooked in the brick oven that was a staple back when the restaurant was "Sapore di Mare."     If you don't remember back that far then you certainly don't know the reason Route 27 is so close to the site!?  Well I'll tell you, it's owed to two feuding brothers, one who designed highways for the state and the other who owned a house in Wainscott!

Classic design meets chic renovation!

Well enough about the location, the food which comes with a Sicilian pedigree (Cinzia comes from a long line of Italian restauranteurs) that goes all the way back to Sorra Italy has been earning raves from local celebs like Billy Joel, Alan Alda and Howard Stern to name a few.   In fact, I bet next door neighbor Ron Perlman will soon swing by for some Bucatini con Sarde ... the smells will get 'em and I heard he loves to walk everywhere!   There's no doubt it will be attracting the same crowd plus a few new ones with the expanded dining room.   Osteria Salina will open it's doors quietly this Thursday (5/21) night at 5pm and be open for business year round.   It's a great addition to the area and if you have any doubt they're aiming for a different crowd than the last establishment, stop by on Sunday's from 1 to 9pm when they'll be serving traditional Sophia Loren sized "family style" dinners.    If you want a reservation and my guess is your going to need them... check out the restaurant on OPENTABLE.COM  

As any real estate on the east end will tell you, dealing with Summer rentals is never easy.    This Friday will no doubt too be another hair raising experience for agents all over as tenants start to move into their seasonal rentals.  Yes, I'll soon be getting calls about defective toasters, noisy neighbors and even the occasional call asking for an address (write it down before you go out drinking).     Well it's a few
years later and now enough time has passed to tell a tale I from a few years ago when one tenant called me complaining about the wireless Internet.   I explained I wasn't an expert but I would swing by and take a look.    Apparently the code for the wifi wasn't working and I thought I'd give it a shot.    When I arrived I input the code and bing!  It worked!   What was the problem?   Well, when I gave them the code in the e mail I wrote "the password is case sensitive xyz."  Yes, you got it... they wrote "CASE SENSITIVE" when inputting the code.  By the way, English was their first language and it was a $200k+ seasonal rental!    Only in the Hamptons!

17,500 Reasons why the Kardashians Kame to the Hamptons.... plus it's Totally 80's Time at the Talkhouse!

The Klassiest Kids in Town!? 

In case you've been living under a rock the Hamptons are buzzing with the comings and goings ... or should I say Komings... ugh... no ... comings and goings of the Kardashians.   If you don't believe me go to Google and search "Kardashian Hamptons" and you'll get about 17,500 news articles come up.   Meanwhile search "Hamptons Deer Cull" and you get 2 articles.   I'm so glad we have our priorities straight! Anyway, while you read about "13 Hot Spots Too Classy for the Kardashians" or even "9 Things to Know about their Summer in the Hamptons,"   I'm going to add one more tid-bit to the mix.   I'm hearing via the grapevine that producers for the show..... are not only asking to see if they can shoot in local restaurants and get all the patrons to sign releases but that they're also allegedly asking to get it for free!      Their claim is that their show has done a lot to help businesses increase traffic and everyone should be thrilled to have KK-K shoot in their restaurant.    SO, how is it going?   My sources say not so good.   The "K's" are going after spots that are already hot and don't need "Z" list celebrities to promote their business.   Think about it, do you really think the Hamptons A list need an endorsement from the Kardashians?    I'm sure Jerry Seinfeld and Gwyneth are both waiting with baited breath to see where they've decided to dine!   By the way, let's also be real here.. .they're living in NOYAC.... not Southampton... I'm dying to know if they've made it yet to Cromer's for some fried chicken or mac and cheese!?      

In honor of throwback Thursday, I'm doing a little plug for Stephen Talkhouse this weekend.  One of the best and underrated bands from the 1980's is playing tomorrow night.   Yes, the English Beat featuring Dave Wakeling is coming to town.   I've seen the band here a few times over the past few years and in a way, it's kind of a perennial.    Playing all their hits including "I Confess, Mirror in the Bathroom, Save it for Later" and even a few General Public songs (Wakeling was basically the heart of both bands), the show is amazing.  I think I'm too old to go to an arena and see anyone.     But the intimate setting of The Talkhouse makes for a really memorable night.    You can buy tickets here ahead of time and in case you don't know the band, here's one of my favorite songs by them... trust me you should go!

Do You Make the Cut?! Take the Quiz to See if You Qualify for The Hamptons "A LIST!"

When I was younger, I once asked my mother about one of my friends who always bragged about the  money his family had.   She told me, "real money whispers, it doesn't scream."    Hmmmmm..... "does that mean we have money?"  She then laughed and said "hardly."    Anyway,  I kind of feel the same way about a lot of things.   I don't trust the guy who always claims he's "honest" and I don't believe the person who brags about their social status.

If you booked it 20 minutes ago, you're A List!

That being said, It was the late 80's and I was living in NYC having fun, care free, poor and young.    I had no clue about how some people view the world.   So, it was a shock to me when one of my close friends at the time announced to me he no longer wished to hang the same haunts with me anymore because, "there are no "A" list people in this crowd."   OK!   Who knew New Orleans (where this person lived before NY) was a training ground for New York's elite.    Silly me.   Well low and behold that same person is here in the Hamptons and no doubt glomming where ever there is glomming to be done!  So that had me thinking.  How do you really know if you're on the "A" list in the Hamptons?   After consulting with some of my fave' Hamptons Chatter consultants I came up with the following quiz to help folks know where they rank in the hierarchy!    So take the quiz if you dare!    I'll let you know how you did at the end!


Question 1:   It's a Saturday night in July and you have 2 house guests.   There are 4 of you total and you all decide at the last minute to go out to dinner.   Do you...

A)   Not sweat it, there are like 5 restaurants you can call who will sneak you in!
B)   Run over a few minutes early and hope they remember you and get you to the top of the list.
C)   Go to the restaurant of choice and put your name on the list and wait.
D)   Suggest the Princess Diner.
E)   Burger bites to go from the Hess station in Wainscott.

Question 2:  When it comes to getting a beach sticker, you....

A)  Ask "what's a beach sticker?  I just walk out my door! "
B)  Get a new one and put it on your "beach car" next to the past 5 years of stickers!
C)  Don't need one, we bike!
D)  Convince everyone Mastic-Shirley is still the Hamptons and hop in the car!

Yeah, Mariska is A list!

Question 3:  When discussing Hamptons Magazine or Dan's, you remind everyone...
A)  "I've been on the cover." (or in the case of Dan's painted the cover)
B)  "Been profiled and or been on the "list" more than once!"
C)  you were once in party picture, because you "photo bombed Alec Baldwin."
D)  you've "never been in Hamptons or Dan's" but you're a "regular in the Press police blotter."

Question 4:  Location is everything and your home is ...
A) South of the Highway and super close to the beach.
B) Village/Village Fringe and definitely a good hood.
C)  A 30 minute drive to town away from it all but really we don't mind.
D) Can't really say, they make us move the trailer every two weeks.

A "C" list event!

Question 5: My typical Summer Saturday night consists of...
A) Inviting everyone to a fabulous benefit and I'm on the host committee.
B) Going to a fabulous benefit and my friend is on the host committee.
C) Hiding a bottle of booze, grabbing dinner from Citarella and heading to a beach.
D) Going to a dinner followed by Kareoke at my real estate agent's house.
E) I desperately remain at home, inventing lovers on the phone.

 Question 6:  How would you best describe the interior of your home?
A)  I had a fabulous up and coming designer create a unique style.
B)  I had a fabulous up and coming designer help me from DWR/Restoration Hardware.
C)  I had a fabulous up and coming designer from Home Goods in Riverhead.
D)  I had a fabulous up and coming designer help me who was institutionalized in '73.
E)  I had my mother give me her old furniture.

Question 7:  In the Hamptons being spotted with a celebrity is social gold!  Would you say you hang with...
A)  Madge, Jerry, J-Lo and we rotate hosting!
B)  My friend who won a Emmy/Grammy or Tony back in the 80's/90's!
C)  My friend who was a Real Housewife!
D)  Khloe and Kourtney ... in fact, I found them their store location!
E)   My friend who was a guest on Jerry Springer!  But the kid wasn't his.

Question 8:  When traveling to the East End in the summer do you...

Dan's your gateway to A- List!

A)   Stay put at the beach till Labor Day.
B)   Have your driver take the back roads on Thursdays and Tuesdays.
C)   Take the Ambassador or Luxury Liner.
D)   Take the NJ Transit Casino bus to AC with the $15 in free quarters.

Question 9:   One institution in the Hamptons is Murph's Tavern in Sag Harbor.    You ....
A) have been a few times with the nanny or tennis instructor so don't tell my spouse.
B) Remark, "That bar on 114,  I went a few times."
C) Get your mail delivered there!
D) Sniff "Never, someone might see me!"

Question 10:   A topic of conversation at dinner is ...
A) The difficulty in finding a good personal chef!
B) The difficulty in finding a good caterer!
C) The difficulty in finding good take out food!
D) The A****** on the "B" weekend who keeps stealing your booze out of the refrigerator!

So here's the key.... A answers are worth 10 points.  B- 8 Points  C- 7 Points   D-6 points
E - minus one point and if none of the answers apply 7.5 points.   Now grade yourself like you were back in High School!  If you scored...

90-100 --YOU ARE "A" LIST!!! You are Hamptons Royalty and probably shouldn't be reading this blog.  Trust me it's beneath you.

80-89--    You are definitely B-List.   I scored an 80 so I made B-List by the hair of my chinny chin chin!  So there you have it my friend had every right to dump me!  I'm soooo not A-List!

70-79    You are on the C list but loving life and I want to hang with you!

69 and below  Can I recommend Wildwood Crest or Seaside Heights?


FINAL SCORING: Minus 90 points if you took this quiz seriously you loser!    Otherwise, let me know how you did!  Post away!

It's that time of year, Beach Permits are selling like hot cakes... again!!! Plus, bracing for the rude Hamptons!

Yep, the snow just melted but already we're fast approaching the end of the line for the most prized posession of Summer 2013!  I'm of course talking about East Hampton Village Beach permits.   While the price has risen to $375.00 for this coming season, that hasn't stopped the rush.    While town permits for East Hampton Town and Southampton Village and Town beach permits are unlitmited and they don't run out, EHV sells about 3000.    As of today, there are only about 300 or so permits left.   So, if you're curious how to get a permit and where you can use them, click here.   That means there are only about 10% left, sadly I had to use a calculator to figure that out.    So unless you want to bike to beach after that Fly Wheel spin class you better hurry!!!

So, while Summer is right around the corner that got me to thinking is it really that bad out here during the season?  I mean are the lines at the Golden Pear any longer ... are the waiters and waitresses less patient... is the parking lot at King Kullen any less aggressive?   Well in my 3rd and final chat with author Steven Gaines and film reviewer and stand up comic Bill McCuddy we addressed the very nature of Hamptons culture... RIGHT OR RUDE!?  Which also happens to be the name of Bill's new web page and facebook fan page.   Check it out and let me know what you think.

 

 

A special OCSAR'S edition... plus a little chat on celebs in the Hamptons!

Hi guys, I normally don't post on Saturdays but what the heck.  It's Oscar Weekend in Hollywood and since we here in the Hamptons have our fair share of residents attending, I thought it was worth a bonus  Hamptons Chatter on the connection between the two.     Yeah,  I know this isn't quite the quality of say the Today Show but we'll get there soon.  It's been a long time since I did anything like this and my editor is doing his best to make us all look good.   So, that being said my second VIDEO blog.      Is it a  little wacky and rambling, yes.  But I hope you enjoy anyway.   A special thanks to my former anchor Bill McCuddy for doing this along with Steven Gaines, Author of Philistines at the Hedgerow.  So live from my kitchen... Hamptons Chatter!

Me, SJP and 13 nice things about the Hamptons!!

Last night I was at the NY Sheraton for the annual Empire State Pride Agenda, fall dinner. It was actually a really great event for a great cause. Senator Kirsten Gillibrand was there as was Mayor Michael Bloomberg and Governor David Patterson. The event was hosted by Andy Cohen of Bravo and Sarah Jessica Parker. Now, I've known Andy for years and he introduced me to Ms. Parker or as he calls her SJP. I have to say, she was more attractive in person than in any of her movies or on the TV show. She was also absolutely charming. So now, if you read this blog you know I wasn't crazy about "Sex and the City 2" the movie. Well, I take it back. I'm going to only say nice things about the Movie and SJP! She's my new BFF.

So that had me thinking. Now that I've turned over a new leaf of saying only nice things about S&TC2, maybe I should say nice things about some other places and people I've often slighted. So, since today is Friday the 13Th I'm going to add some positive energy to the day and say 13 nice things. Here it goes....

#1 Bay Burger in Sag Harbor ... nice thing... they have a very smooth parking lot!

OK, how did I do? I'll keep going....

#2 The smell of the East Hampton Gym and the stale smelling towels keep me alert when working out!

#3 Bagel Buoy in Sag Harbor... the bagels are very round!

#4 Joan Jedell's Hamptons hot sheet is great for starting bonfires!

#5 The traffic on 27 isn't really that bad on Sunday mornings in January!

#6 The Golden Pear's $10 gazpacho makes me spend $10 less on wine!

#7 That agent that looks like Ms. Piggy is much better looking than their boyfriend!

Gosh this is hard... I'm thinking... I'm thinking... hummmmmm....

#8 The produce in Walbaum's isn't as rancid as it looks!

#9 Riverhead is a great place if you like fast food!

#10 Murphs in Sag Harbor has a floor that's very difficult to slip on!

#11 I don't have to ever worry about sleeping too late, now that I have my Beagle Russell!

#12 ATT's lousy reception keeps me from spending too much time talking to long winded real estate agents!

and.... drum roll..... #13 the orange parking ticket on my window looks so great with all of the Fall colors!!!

Whoa! Oh before I forget. I have to post this video. If you haven't seen it yet you should. What do you think happens to a McDonalds Happy Meal after 6 months. Take a look. Bay Burger may not seem so bad now!

Come along hear the song that we're singing... come on get HAPPY!

It was a beautiful week in the Hamptons but not for humpback whales unfortunately. Anyway, an awesome week and Friday is of course full of rain. What can you do today to put you back in that happy mood??? Why go to a HAPPY HOUR of course. So, if you're looking for some suggestions here is a really great one!!!

The Palm in East Hampton is having what they call PRIME TIME, weekdays at the bar. While drinks are full priced the appetizers and nibbles are dirt cheap. A platter of KOBE BEEF SLIDERS which are normally $10 are $3.50!!! Yes, $3.50 and no they don't cheat you out and give you a spa portion! In fact, all of their PRIME BITES MENU is $3.50each! What a deal... Filet Mignon Capri Sandwiches, Calamari Fritti, Mini Broiled Crab Cakes and tons more. It's totally awesome. If you haven't been to the bar at The Palm, the bar itself is small but there's plenty of booths, tables and comfy chairs. The only downside of this is the occasional overbearing scent of cologne or perfume. I'm not sure why Hai Karate and Jean Nate wearers favor The Palm. It's just one of those eternal mysteries only Leonard Nimoy would dare explore!!


Finally, my last place for a great happy hour is my sofa with a nice glass of anything. OK, maybe not anything... I don't like Riesling or Sterno! Anyway, have a great Friday night all!!! Hope to see you soon!